Spike is given a soul
by Newtinmpls
Summary: By season three I was heartily sick of Angel being the only Vampire-with-a-soul, but it wasn't until season four that I figured out a way I thought it could happen. This story is just the how it happens; any aftermath would be future chapters. Review and critique if you want to see more.


I originally wrote this back between season four and five, thinking that I was a bit tired of Angel being mister "only vamp with a soul". I figured it would take some pretty softhearted and magically talented folks to accomplish it.

Rated T for naughty truancy

"So why can't Buffy be in a relationship with Spike?" Dawn was picking idly at her French fries as she spoke.

Tara was surprised at the question. "He's a vampire."

"So was Angel."

"He had a soul."

Dawn pointed at her with a french fry. "He's a friend. He works with the scoobies a lot. And anyway isn't that chip thing still working?"

Tara shook her head a little. "No. Um, no that's not the same thing." She considered. "It's like… a rabid dog is still rabid even if he's been muzzled."

Dawn stabbed at her pool of ketchup with another fry. "So how could we get him one?" At the odd look she got from Tara, she added. "I mean in theory, could it be done?"

Somewhat unwillingly, Tara considered the idea. "Well it would be pointless to curse him like Angel. As soon as he was happy with someone, he'd just loose it again." Without really thinking about it, Tara mused. "The better way would be to give him part of someone else's."

Dawn looked interested. "Can you do that? I mean is it like donating blood or something, is there enough extra?"

"It would work better if there was more than one 'donor' involved, but-" Tara cut off. "You do realize that this whole thing, I mean this is all theoretical. This wouldn't really work. I mean it couldn't."

Dawn looked down to hide her expression. "Of course, just theory." Then she added. "Um, why wouldn't it work?"

"Well for one thing, he'd have to be willing. This isn't a curse, it's not going to happen without him being involved."

"Well, if it got him closer to Buffy, why wouldn't he want to?"

"Dawnie," Tara's voice was soft and intent. "Because of the chip, Spike can't actually hurt people. But even so, he doesn't feel any regret for the horrible things he's done. With a soul, he would. At least I think that's how it would work." She looked momentarily uncertain. "Anyway, he's been a vampire for a long time. He's probably done a lot of horrible things."

Remembering some of the stories Spike had told her, Dawn had to agree. There was no 'probably' about it. He had done a lot of really horrible things.

"Spike?" Dawn hadn't come here in a while; and while it was technically almost sunrise, it still wasn't safe from any vampires that might be about.

She felt a light tap on her shoulder, and whirled, suddenly cold. Maybe this had been a really bad idea.

Spike was standing there behind her, arms crossed, staring at her. He was frowning. "Little bit, what are you doing out here? Bloody foolish, why don't you just wear a sign that says 'walking happy meal'" After a moment he added. "Well come on in." Walking past her, he led the way into his crypt.

She looked around, wide-eyed. It was a lot more furnished than it had been last time she was here. "Um, you've been decorating." Then she noted a bag of what had obviously been blood, tossed into a corner. "Sort of."

She turned to look at him, and found that he was staring fixedly at her.

"Well, bit, are you going to tell me, or should I bloody guess what's up. It's obvious that something is."

She couldn't think about any subtle way to bring it up. Oh well, she thought to herself, here goes nothing. "Um, Spike, would you ever want a soul?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Would I ever; what?"

"Want a soul?" She was beginning to think this had been a mistake.

He laughed. "Oh, no, Angelous went that route, and it's not a good one. See, pet, a soul just gets in the way of some of the things that y'need to do as a vamp."

"I was just thinking, I mean if you had a soul, and you weren't evil-"

"Plenty of evil about that's wearin' souls, pet."

"Buffy could love you."

His expression hardened. "Slayer and I have an understanding. Things are just fine how they are."

"But if you-"

"And regardless, this isn't something I ought to be talking about with you. And it's late for me, and I need my beauty sleep."

"But I just-" She trailed off, seeing that he wasn't going to change his mind. "I just wondered."

"Wonder no more."

Dawn was startled from sleep by a knock on her window. She looked around, alarmed, and then realized that it was Spike.

He perched there, shaking his head.

Flipping the covers off of the bed, she hastily scooted across the room and opened the window. "Come in."

He raised a hand. "Not here for a visit; just got a question."

Dawn didn't say anything, but in her pajama pocket, she crossed her fingers.

"That thing you suggested the other night."

"Yeah?"

"If I was interested. Not that I am, mind you, but if I was, how complicated would this be?"

"Well, sorta, but not very. Tara says that you would have to be willing; and there'd be a ritual and stuff."

He looked thoughtful for a moment.

She looked away. "Spike, I really-" But when she looked back to the window, he was gone.

Tara asked softly "Are you sure this is really what you want? Because once we start, there is no going back."

"Of course I'm sure. D'you think I'd be here if I weren't?" Spike looked around the room, eyeing the candles and unfamiliar herbs with some suspicion.

Tara and Dawn exchanged glances. After a moment Tara said. "Let's begin."

From Spike's perspective, most of everything after that was a blur. All He was really aware of was the hands that held his. On his left was Tara, her grip firm, but her hand slightly shaky. Dawn was on his right, and she held his hand tightly, almost as if she wanted to prevent him from letting go.

Part of him resented that; if he hadn't intended to be here, he never would have showed up.

Then he felt .. something. He wasn't sure what it was. It didn't hurt, Not exactly, but it wasn't comfortable at all. His hands tightened on those he was holding, and he was dimly aware that both of them tensed. He was holding too tight, probably. He shook his head and tried to focus. What was going on here? They hadn't said that he couldn't ask questions.

He looked at Tara, but he couldn't quite make her out. His eyes wouldn't seem to focus. Or rather they did, but what he was seeing couldn't be real. It had to be memories. Familiar faces. Something familiar.

"No." His voice was barely a whisper, and then he slumped back, staring straight ahead. It was the last thing he said for a very long time.

He came back to himself as his shoulder was being shaken. He looked up, a little groggy, a little lightheaded maybe, but otherwise okay. It seemed awfully bright. No, that was just a candle. A candle that had burned down considerably from the last time he recalled looking at it. He started to get up, only now realizing that he was laying down on his side.

Dawn was looking at him anxiously. "How do you feel?"

He shook his head to clear it. "Other than a nap with some bloody odd dreams, I'm fine.? He looked at each of them in turn. "I don't really feel all that different. Do we even know if it worked?"

Tara looked nervous, but certain. She nodded slightly. "We, we know. That it did work, I mean."

He shook his head and stood up. Or at least that's what he had intended. His legs were so shaky that he had to lean against the wall to remain upright. "Bloody hell."

Tara and Dawn also stood, and he could see that they were both a bit unsteady as well.

Dawn rolled her eyes. "Well I might actually fall asleep on time tonight."

Tara looked at the clock across the room. "It's late."

Spike stretched, looking relieved. "That's all it is, then. Sitting in one spot riding out a spell. Just need a bit of a stretch to work the kinks out."

Dawn and Tara exchanged slightly anxious glances.

After an awkward pause, Tara said. "Do you want one of us to stay with you?"

Spike affected shock. "With me? I am the last one around here that needs a sitter, and as you pointed out a second ago, it's late, Dawn needs to get home, and the last thing slayer'd appreciate right now is me as an escort. So I'll be on my way.

Tara shook her head. "I haven't seen him either."

Dawn bit her lip. "Do you think he's okay?"

Tara shrugged. "Well, I've heard that sometimes it takes a couple days to really sink in. But I've never actually done anything like this before. He seemed fine the last time we talked to him." She sounded like she was trying to convince herself.

Dawn looked toward the window. "It's almost dusk. Maybe could we just sort of visit his crypt? Just to check, I mean?"

"I don't think Buffy would like-"

"Then we won't tell her. She's with the scoobies now, researching diamond-eating ice demons. C'mon, let's go and I'll be home before she even starts her patrol."

"We shouldn't." Tara was torn.

"Please? Just for a minute? I mean we did a spell on him. We really ought to make sure that he's okay. We're responsible."

Tara nodded ruefully at that. "Okay, but just for a minute." She conceded.

Dawn led the way into the Crypt. She'd been here before, but it usually wasn't this messy. "Spike?"

There was no response.

Tara looked around hesitantly. "Maybe we should go."

"Let's check downstairs." Dawn went quickly to the ladder, before Tara could change her mind. Clattering rapidly down, she called again, louder this time. "Spike!"

She turned, to see a pile of blankets shift a bit. From the depths of it, a voice came, muffled and irritated. "'m not deaf." He waved an arm in her general direction. "Go away."

"Spike we just came to see if you were all right."

Tara slowly made her way down the stairs, watching them.

"'m fine, bit. Just need a bit more of a nod-off." He stayed buried under the blankets.

Dawn approached the bed more closely. "You don't sound fine."

"I" He spoke sharply. "Am a vampire. And I was an adult before I became a vampire. I'll be fine, if you two goody two shoes will just let me get some rest." He could feel his voice begin to shake at the end, and he stopped, not wanting them to hear it.

Dawn was clenching her hands together. "Well, if you ever want to talk, or anything," Aware of his irritation, she tried to be casual. "Well, you know where I live."

"Right." He bit off the comment. "It's late. Go."

Slowly, they left.

Dawn whispered. "He seems kind of upset."

"I know."

As they got to the top of the ladder, his voice came to them. "'M not deaf. Talk about me after you leave."

They glanced guiltily at each other and hastened out.

Once he was sure they were gone, he relaxed. Still under the blanket, he buried his face in his hands, shaking. "Bloody hell." His voice was just a whisper.

Dawn was half-asleep when she heard the voice. "Can I stay here? That alright?"

"Sure." She murmured sleepily.

When she woke all the way, she would have thought it had only been a dream, but in the corner of her room, there was Spike. He was crouched over, eyes half closed.

She would have spoken loudly, but glanced uneasily toward Buffy's room. In a half whisper she asked. "Spike?"

She got out of bed, and crept over toward him.

He didn't actually respond until she put a hand on his shoulder.

"Little bit." He managed.

She knelt next to him, kind of wanting to hug him. He looked terrible. But can you hug vampires? "You don't look so good."

"She." He swallowed, and clarified. "The witch said it might be." He paused, searching for a word. "uncomfortable."

She bit her lip, not really certain what to say, or what to do.

He shook his head. His eyes were distant, not really focused on anything. "It's odd."

"I'm sorry."

"No." He reached out a hand over one of hers. "No, it's not like that, it's just, I haven't felt." He swallowed. "Everything's so much more intense." After a moment, he added, almost inaudibly. "Well, not everything."

There came a knock on the door, and then Buffy's voice. "Dawn? You up?"

Spike startled badly at the sound of her voice, and without thinking about it, Dawn put her arms around him. Half-twisting toward the door, she yelled hastily. "Don't come in."

"Dawn." Buffy sounded impatient.

"I'm naked. I'll be out in a minute."

Even as upset as he was, Spike managed a grin at that.

Buffy sounded reassured and irritated. "Whatever. Breakfast in ten." Then came the sound of footsteps walking away.

Spike murmured. "Shouldn't be lying like that. I'm a bad influence on you." He was still smiling, though.

Buffy picked up the phone. "Summers residence."

After a moment she looked furious, but when she spoke, it was in a quiet voice. "No, no she wasn't truant, she was ill. I'm sorry, I didn't even think about calling."

She listened for a while, and then said softly. "I'm very sorry, it won't happen again." After a moment she hung up the phone. Standing there in the kitchen she murmured softly. "No it most certainly will not happen again. When I get my hands on her."

Angrily she stalked up the stairs. "Dawn!"

In her bedroom, Dawn looked alarmed. "Oh, this is so not good." She still had one arm

around Spike, who was lying on her bed, half curled up.

He was staring off into the distance. After a moment he smiled, and it was not pleasant. He whispered, as if to himself. "Slayer." He sounded strangely satisfied.

Dawn could hear Buffy's footsteps coming up the stairs, and she stood up, anxious to find some way to save the situation. It had been a pain to get Spike onto the bed at all. He obviously wasn't moving any time soon.

Hastily she bundled covers onto him. "Just stay still. Let her think the room is messy." It wasn't much of a disguise, but it was all she could think of for the moment. It would have to do.

Too late, it occurred to her that if she was going to act like she'd felt sick, she ought to be the one in bed.

The door slammed open, and Buffy stood there, looking furious.

"I just got a call from the school."

Dawn tried to smile, and held her hands up as if to distract Buffy from looking any further into the room. "It was bad, I mean I know I didn't tell you, but I was feeling really-" Her voice trailed off as she realized that Buffy was staring at the bed.

"What is that?" Almost unbelievingly Buffy stared at the disarrayed bed. There was obviously an occupant. "No, who is that? Don't tell me that you play hooky and then spend the day with a boy."

"No," Dawn protested. "No, it's not like that at all."

Buffy pushed past her easily, and stalked towards the bed. "Who ever you are, you made a very big mistake." She grabbed the covers and in one swift motion, ripped them from the bed.

Spike didn't even look up. He was staring vacantly, lying in a semi-fetal position. After a long moment he said softly. "Slayer."

Buffy stared at him, almost disbelievingly. "You." She glanced at Dawn, and then furiously back at Spike. "How could you?"

Dawn tried to explain. "Buffy, it's not what you think."

"You, you." Too angry to think of what to call him, Buffy tossed Spike off the bed and into the wall, breaking the plasterboard. He slumped to the ground, still looking vacant.

Dawn clambered across the bed, trying to stay between them. "Buffy, don't, you don't understand."

Ignoring Dawn, Buffy reached inside her jacket and pulled out the stake she usually carried. "You should have been dust a long time ago."

Spike watched her. He didn't give much for Dawn's chances of being able to stop the slayer in this mood. So she was probably going to kill him. Somehow that didn't seem particularly important.

Grabbing Buffy's arm, Dawn screamed. "Please Buffy! Don't do this!"

Shaking her off, Buffy cocked the stake, obviously intending to throw it.

Dawn ran to put herself between them. "Buffy, he has a soul!"

Buffy remained where she was, staring coldly across the room as if she could see through her sister. "No he doesn't, and there isn't going to be a question about it in a moment or two. Move."

Dawn clenched her fists and spoke in a voice that was loud and determined. "He has a soul, Buffy. He has part of mine."

There was a long moment of silence.

"What?" The question came both from Buffy and from Spike.


End file.
